Trade-offs forever and ever

Home:

The other day, Khalil and David were talking about my work, and David explained how books are made and all of the jobs you can have related to books. He said, “A marketer tells people all the good things about a book, so they know about it.” Khalil didn’t miss a beat. “I think I am the marketer of Frank.”

Six months in, and we all continue to be completely obsessed with little Frances Jean the Jelly Bean. He is mushy and rolly and drooly. David is still off on parental leave (thank you, Canada).

House:

David and I often talk about the fact that you just cannot, no matter how hard you try, have everything at once. Here’s one example. We feel very, very lucky to live on the lake here in Canada and have treasured every day with our sweet waterfowl and foxes and the occasional coyote. We love the apple tree in the front yard and our rambling split-level. There are two neighbors, in particular, who have taken great care of us over these last four years. We will miss them. 

Also, whenever I need to go somewhere, David has to drive me because we are not walking distance to anything. I do not go anywhere alone—my life in this house has a bit of a Rapunzel vibe. Also, Khalil spends much of her time in a park across town and most of her friends live down that way, she is most at home there. Also, I cannot use many rooms in the house because of all of the stairs. I dream of an accessible home. 

And so, we are solving some problems and creating others (something we will continue doing in perpetuity). In a week, we are moving to a rental house near our favorite park and within walking distance of most of what I need (doctors, stores, etc.). While we live in that rental, we will be building a fully accessible home next to our favorite park. We will both miss the water and we will also love being a part of a new community. It’s all trade-offs. 

Books:

Dateable is out in the world, and we have received the most beautiful messages from readers who feel seen by the book. That’s all we wanted, and feel grateful. You can catch me talking about it here, here, here, and here. 

In four weeks, This Is How We Play makes its grand debut. Will I cry so hard I get a stye the first time I hold a copy? Only time will tell, but probably, yes. I am beyond proud of this book. Please let me know if you buy a copy and what your favorite page is. My favorite part of this book is that, finally, there are disabled parents shown having fun and taking care of our children. 

My dear friend Rachel released her book about c-sections in June and is shifting the conversation about labor. It’s so good. Catch her talking about it here. I have two copies to pass on to newsletter readers. To enter, comment on this post with the world GIVEAWAY. I will draw two names on Friday.

Thank you, to everyone who has purchased my books and continues to support my work. It’s hard to believe that it’s been only five years since I decided to try writing. What an unbelievable gift to find something I love and can do from bed. I am very lucky. 

This September, may you have at least a few good moments every day that you are able to notice and take in. 

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Poem

Mira, 1550, India

So fragile this petal the earth,

as fragile as

love.